“Walk where your heart leads you, there are no restrictions and no burdens”. ~ GAO XINGJIAN, Nocturnal Wanderer ~
Freedom is of a large scope term that includes not only the right of free choice, but the ability to exercise the right of free choice. Throughout history people have strived to be free. Yet all people still live with less freedom than is possible. Individuals must sacrifice some of their freedom in order to live in even a democratic society, such as for example not being able to violate any laws. Additionally, even if one lives in a free society, their freedom is limited by the need to earn a living, which subjects them to spending time in a tyranny environment if they work for an employer, or the servitude of being tied to operating their own business.
What’s so interesting…On one hand most of us would name freedom to be one of top five necessities in life. However, it gets even more interesting once you discover that on the other hand, most of us do everything within our power to surround ourselves with boundaries.
The more I talked the subject over with friends, the more I noticed how addicted we are to our own “comfort zone”. From work to home, from relationships to family, from habits to environment, we desperately try to create our own “safety grounds”.
What fascinated me most is the fact that hardly anyone could properly explain to me why it is so. So should we distinct freedom versus security? Like saying: yes, I love my freedom, as long as I am secure! Fun part being that the few people I met who thought otherwise had been extremely successful in life (let’s call them the fearless freedom seekers) have something in common that most people don’t have. What they have is a rare TRUST in life. No matter what happens, life will be good. Yet, when I came to think of it, I had to admit that on the moments I had been in such a vibe, my life also turned out in a real fortunate way.
It turned out to be that it’s not about being careless, yet it is more about trust. Ok, fine but trust in what? So i asked myself “When have I been most successful?” A few letters came to mind… T.R.U.S.T.! That was it! I never needed this so called ‘security’, I always wanted to taste freedom to the fullest, but the one binding structure had always been trust! Trust in the fact that no matter what happened I could coop with it; trust in the fact that things will turn out in a good way, as long as I dared to rely on myself.
If business at times doesn’t run the way i want it to, I, conclude that it will soon turn for the best. At that point i ‘let it go’, sure of the fact that it will. Guess what? It always does! What if it wouldn’t? Now, I first of all prefer never to think of negative scenarios, and if that occasionally does happen, I push those thoughts away. Simply by telling myself that it’s a waste to think that way. Secondly: what if? Somehow throughout life, I’ve always been able of convincing myself that no matter what, I would survive. What is the worst that could happen? I can always serve coffee in a restaurant. Case closed.
Now where is the link between ‘freedom’ and the trust I’m talking about? Well, once you dare to get out of the restrictions you have built for yourself, lose the scare of losing your comfort zone, the world becomes an endless ‘playground’ filled with opportunities!
A great example is my friend Margaret. She lost her business and moved across the country to work as a waitress in a hotel. She is a divorced mom, who had to take care of her 3 year old. I was there the day that the hotel was taken over by a new owner. Her friend who also worked there was all shook up and kept advising her on what to wear, what to say and what to do, in order to make a good impression on the new owner. Margaret listened, yet continued to trust on her instincts. She by now knew, that no matter what happened she would survive. Due to her previous experiences and setbacks in life, she no longer knew the scare of being drawn out of her comfort-zone. Her ‘what if’ issue, had no other answer to it than “we’ll see”. Guess what? Now, two years later, She has made a flourishing career. Not only did she end up managing the hotel, she’s about to be the proud owner of her own hotel.
What does this teach us? Well, I have to say that Margaret’s story is not unique. And the more exploring I did, the more it made me realize that this openness towards life, this trust on “Whatever will be, will be”, plus a loyal believe in the fact that all will be all right and the trust in yourself to be able to handle all, with a willingness to make the whole world your comfort-zone and a dash of the ‘nothing to lose’ spirit, seems to be doing the trick… And once again, beneath it all lays the skill to silence your ongoing mind on possible scenarios and truly listen to your heart. It’s a challenge, but I can guarantee you, once you get the hang of it, face your fears and defeat them, life might have some super nice treats for you!
See you back soon for another wild ride. For now remember just one more thing: “True freedom can only be reached when you set yourself free of self- acclaimed boundaries”